


All Quiet on the Eastern Front

by Hagar



Series: Stubborn, Silent and Grey [3]
Category: NCIS
Genre: Current Events, Gen, Inspired by Real Events, Satire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-22
Updated: 2012-11-22
Packaged: 2017-11-19 06:28:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/570216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hagar/pseuds/Hagar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scenes from the MCRT bullpen and other related locations during Operation: Pillar of Cloud.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Quiet on the Eastern Front

**Author's Note:**

> At the time of Pillar of Cloud (or Pillar of Defence, as it was Englicised), Anat is working one of the Shin-Beit's Gaza desks. Given that half the intel for the airstrikes came from the Shin-Beit, this puts Anat right in the middle of the fray.

_Monday, November 12_

[The team is at a crime scene. Tony is taking measurements, Gibbs is "interviewing" witnesses; McGee and Ziva return to the truck to pick up some equipment, and Tim pulls off a glove and pulls out his cell phone. His face goes white.]  
Ziva: Is your sister all right?  
Tim: What - no. It's not my sister.  
Ziva: Then who is it?  
Tim: It's Anat.  
[Ziva stills.]  
Tim: [speaking quietly; his eyes are wide] She says that this is why she didn't let Effie adopt a cat.  
Ziva: [urgent whisper] She expects to sleep at the office for three days and Effie's reserve activated?  
Tim: [looks]  
Ziva: sss'emek.

 

* * *

_Wednesday, November 14_

From the [official IDF tumblr](http://idfonline.tumblr.com):

 

 

* * *

_Sunday, November 18_

 

 

* * *

 

_Meme protesting the death of a Palestinian family, circulated around Facebook and communicated by Haaretz. Red-tinted image of a bombed Palestinian house; text translates idiomatically as "Paediatric Surgery" and literally as "Children's Surgical", and mocks the common use of the word "surgical" to describe precision airstrikes._

* * *

 

[Team Gibbs are at their tables. McGee's cell phone is next to his keyboard, face up. It lights up with a text message, and McGee checks it before turning to Tony.]  
Tim: Hey, Tony, look alive.  
Tony: [plays dead]  
Tim: [snaps a photo with his cell phone]  
Tony: Why did you just take a photo of me?  
Tim: Because Anat asked for something funny.  
Tony: Is her workplace making her plot infanticide again?  
Tim: [sharply] That wasn't funny, Tony.  
Tony: It sorts of was.  
[Ziva finally looks up from her paperwork, directly at Tony.]  
Ziva: That was in poor taste even for you, Tony.  
Tony: [makes a face]  
[Gibbs is very pointedly not looking at them all.]  
Gibbs: It's called an operational error, DiNozzo. You throw around enough bombs, it happens.  
Tony: I'm sorry, boss, I thought we're calling it Children's Surgical, nowadays.

 

* * *

_Wednesday, 21 November_

[It's 07:30 in the morning. Tim comes in looking particularly alarmed. Tony is watching a lifestyle morning program on the plasmas.]  
Tim: Switch to ZNN.  
Tony: A little early in the morning for the news, isn't it, McGee?  
Tim: I think something terrible happened.  
Tony: Did you see that in your tea leaves this morning?  
Tim: Anat texted me a photo of a baby gorilla.  
Tony: [switches to ZNN immediately] Oh. Something terrible _did_ happen.

 

 

* * *

 

[Anat M] Fic me this: http://www.ynet.co.il/PicServer3/2012/11/15/4271853/42715070100099408258no.jpg  
[Anat M] I WANT ALL THE FIC  
[Me] NO.  
[Anat M] It needs to be fic.  
[Me] Anat, I am not writing you slash.  
[Me] Any slash.  
[Me] Let alone this slash. Isn't it treason for you to ask me this?  
[Anat M] :(  
[Anat M] ::sighs:: I suppose I'll just have to post my fic then.  
[Anat M] You know the one, with Amy and McGregor and their Very Favorite Toys.  
[Me] ANAT.  
[Me] I WILL BLOCK YOUR ACCESS  
[Anat M] Chill, Tim. I wasn't going to do it anyway.  
[Anat M] I'll introduce Ziva to fanfic.  
[Anat M] Why waste fic if I can post it later.  
[Me] I hate you.  
[Anat M] No you don't. You can't hate me.  
[Me] Watch me.  
[Anat M] My girlfriend is still a better hacker than you are.  
[Me] Anat, did you sleep in the past week?  
[Anat M] I think so, it's still Wednesday.  
[Me] It's the other Wednesday. I am texting _your girlfriend_ right now.  
[Anat M] Traitor.  
[Me] I'm telling her to bring the dart gun. I'm doing this because I love you.  
...  
[Anat M] You're so civilized, Tim. You know I prefer to club the love of my life over the head, cavewoman style.  
[Me] Hi, Effie. Is she asleep now?  
[Anat M] She's in the shower.  
[Me] Progress?  
[Anat M] Progress.  
[Anat M] Oh, and Tim?  
[Me] Yes?  
[Anat M] I'm still a better hacker than you are.

**Author's Note:**

> I agree with Anat: would anybody please write that slashfic?


End file.
